Dear Diary 051: The Surprising Joy of Letting Go
Exclusive Content for Paid Supporters!🙏
📚 Buy the Book → - Gift from the Sea - Anne Morrow Lindberg
I’ve been sitting here at Atlanta Airport. It’s my 4-hour planned layover plus a 2-hour unexpected layover aka delay. I’m on my back from Costa Rica where I was recently attending a yoga and surf retreat.
It’s a sustainability-focused lodge (read: it has no A/C among other amenities I was used to in the United States). During my week there, average temperatures were in the 90s with 90% humidity. In other words, you sweat 24/7.
You cannot control the weather and therefore you cannot control your sweating. The internet was spotty at best. I had no cellphone service. The village was small with dirt roads aka no nightlife to speak of.
Devoid of distractions that are prevalent in the modern world or, in my case, New York City. I was forced to face my boredom and uncomfortability head-on.
It’s not for everyone. It’s not for me. If this was a choice, I may have skipped out.
I definitely would’ve skipped out.
I wish I had read carefully and seen that there was no A/C at the bottom of the lodge FAQ before booking this trip.
Unfortunately, eagerness tends to cloud judgment.
It was hot and humid until around 1 am. Every night, I couldn’t sleep because I was wet. Followed by Howler monkeys screaming at 3 am. Surf was at 6:45 am.
In other words, you will not sleep like you do at home, and your rhythm of life takes a new beat.
Letting go.
Materials.
I packed a whole suitcase full of clothes. I ended up only wearing three board shorts and two tank tops all week. I washed them during cold outdoor showers and hung them on the liner outside to dry.
Control.
I used to control the temperature at home. I controlled what time anything would happen. Here, I was just a passenger going for the ride.
Stimulation.
Spotty internet means being bored in 2024. Sitting and watching the ants carry tiny pieces of leaf for hours waiting for a breeze.
Letting your thoughts bounce around until it finally becomes silent. Sounds idyllic but it was painful. Eventually, you can detoxify.
Vanity.
When you sweat non-stop, there is no hiding. You don’t smell great. You don’t look great. However, you start to find outer peace (read: Accepting you at your physical lowest).
Money.
Who cares if you have money in a small village as there is no place to spend it?
Desire.
All the things I’ve wanted turned into two things: Rain and a breeze. I cannot explain the joy when they showed up even for a brief moment. I was literally living in the “moment”.
These are just attributes that makeup who I am.
Ultimately, letting go of who I arrived as.
That’s the reward of traveling.
To let go and become.
Book the ticket.
Life Happens Outside,
Su Hawn
🏕️ Wisdom from the Outpost: Work Together and Switch Roles as You Go - Montana
